Life has many lessons to teach us. Most of those lessons are only learned through interaction with others and our environment. This is in part how we find out “who we really are.” But in order for us to benefit from that we must interact with a variety of people, people who aren’t ALL just like us, people with differing points of view which we can blend with our own to enhance our own beliefs and view of life in general. Diversity in our friends and partners is where growth lives and happens. The same old people teach us the same old things. I’m aware COVID has caused some restrictions with such things however we still have the internet and I’m pleased we’re all using it. Interaction doesn’t need to be face-to-face. I have many friends online that I talk to in DM that I’ve never met in person. Though the written word though at times can cause confusion or misunderstandings it is none the less very powerful, and can always be clarified if confusion happens. I’ve always found for those online friends I have met in person that if we get along well through the written word, in person we’re a mind-blowing easy flowing connection.
My advice here is for all of you to take the lessons others have to offer you. How you may ask? Well take it from me, here’s a little lesson from my vast mentalist/energy reading skills for you. I always say people will show you who they are. Emphasis on the word “show”, not “tell”. We learn who someone is not by their words, words often contain lies, pretense, or silence of the things we’d rather not say, usually for privacy reasons, or maybe to be polite of course. So the story of who someone is always is told by how they treat others, it’s in their general behavior. Even when people fake it and are putting on a show to act a certain way around us their outward energy trips them up. The trick is being observant enough to spot it. One important thing to notice about people is how they treat people who can do nothing for them. My god this lesson is learned fast where I live here in the land of opportunists, i.e. Los Angeles.
Since age 4 I’ve been people watching. I do it and always have because I can’t interpret the energy I read which is all just emotion unless I understand emotion, and understand it on a high level. This little study habit of mine has taught me more about human nature than ALL of the psychology books I’ve read put together. If I meet someone at a dinner party or even just out in public, I can learn far more about them in 30 seconds by their micro-expressions and how they’re behaving in general than any of the words coming out of their mouth. Most people hide a a lot, and I mean a lot, when they’re speaking to you they pause to consider if they’re saying too much, it’s an unmistakable feeling of worry coming off them. You know you do it, I do it, we all do it. People hide feelings in small-talk. What about the happy couple holding hands that isn’t really happy? Couples are a good opener lesson in people reading for anyone because the signs of happy vs. not can be spotted quite easily. One example of this is in how they’re holding hands. This is a very accurate method because often people who are unhappy are desperate to convince others that they are. The subconscious mind when we’re truly in love and happy forces a tight hand-hold reaction. This is because we want to be as close to the person as possible. Loosely held hands, or the famous loose finger hold are a sign of some form of pretense happening or tension and disinterest within the connection usually. This hand hold reaction is involuntary so it’s a good tell. Now that you know about it you’ll catch yourself and you’ll catch others. This is a good and easy entry level example to reading people and situations that can teach you a lot because the couple may be laughing and smiling and telling you how wonderful their life is together, yet the body language you picked up on and the micro-expressions in their faces such as the always easy to spot “happy frown”, which is a smile the moves the eyebrows in the wrong way. It’s a smile that looks off. Anyway these sorts of things tell the real story. You don’t have to call them on it, no need to make a scene, just note it for yourself as a lesson in human nature. As any doctor, cop, or judge will tell you people lie, they don’t tell you the truth. Many times even if you get close to them they still hide the truth from you. And don’t get me wrong here, this is fine, it might be nobody’s business anyway, we all have a right to privacy. But my point is and what I’m trying to convey is that if you really want to know WHO someone is it’s in how they behave, NOT the crap coming out of our mouths.
All people have value, nobody is a shit person unless they’re mentally deranged in some way. And even then it’s not their fault, it’s an illness. So give to others who need it, give everyone a chance to show you who they are. You won’t call everyone you meet or help a friend. Speaking for myself friend is a powerful word. Friendship is earned through a bond of trust with me, and I think it should be for everyone. Many people trust for the wrong reasons, and flimsy ones at that, which is why they often get hurt. They let the wrong people in, choosing them because they’ve worked with them, or they’re part of their church group so they must be okay, or a friend introduced them. NONE of those are valid reasons to “trust” someone. And if you’ve ever been hurt by someone you’ve let in for one of these reasons you I’m sure learned that lesson well, unless of course you’re still repeating it. Fact is someone you don’t know at all, a perfect stranger is equally as likely to either be a best friend for life, or someone who hurts you. And if they’re different from the usual person you associate with likely has even more to teach you than the same old same old person-type would.
Another important factor is making our own decisions about people!! We are the only ones that know how WE feel about a matter. By all means take advice from others if you must, but I promise you nothing gets in the way of and creates more confusion for us around a decision about a potential connection or opportunity of any kind than 3rd party intervention will. Often times others are biased without us even realizing it, either by jealousy of some kind or maybe a bad past experiences of their own that they’ve decided to inject into our situation and regurgitate back to us as “advice”. Don’t even get me started on people who take shit that a past person did to them out on someone new. That’s a psych paper in and of itself. Think back in your life to how many times other people influenced your decisions on various matters. I promise you if you do that you’ll find that many times they were wrong and you later regretted having listened to them. In some cases I’ve had others mislead me about a situation, feeding me false information about it based on their own assumptions, only to find later down the road that none of what they told me was even remotely true or the case.
That said trust your own judgement, your instincts are always your true best friend. At the end of the day choose your friends and partners wisely, choose them by how they make you feel. Many ignore their intuition or instincts about people or situations when in reality it’s the most truthful and perceptive part of us. Our brains try too hard to protect us and apply logic to emotional concerns. Logic plays a part yes, but be it love or a friendship it’s never logical, it’s a feeling. And for god’s sake please make sure people like you for who you are and not just because of what you are or what an association with you does for them. Celebrities and successful people in general are surrounded by these types of “friends” and I use the word friend loosely there. God knows I am, but I’m smart enough to know they’re an acquaintance, not a friend. But that’s part of the game if you’re successful in any way, many people will have an angle. Usually it involves the successful person raising the status in some way of the other person. The trick is in this case to not let it make us so cynical that we screen so harshly and block the good people from coming in, the ones who would appreciate who we are, not just what we are. The other trick is to know they’re a false-friend and not hand them the keys to your full trust. The devil or devil energy will always stroke the ego first. And too many of us succumb to such flattery. It’s actually quite blinding in fact. Which is why I always remain neutral at least at first. This way I know I’m seeing things or the person clearly and I’m not just being bamboozled by a flattering devil. Those that don’t do this and can’t read such things in people foolishly think they’ve found a real friend and often end up used, hurt, betrayed, or all of the above. Or in LA speak, fall victim to a name-dropper friend.
If I’m honest I don’t know who would drop my name, I can’t even get a free cup of coffee with it. In fact when I try,,,,, when I drop my own name…. I’m usually asked to leave and escorted out.. LOL
–Cheers
